Quote of the Week:
Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.
Picture of the week:
2009 Worldwide Tropical Cyclone Names
Danny-Next One Up
Erika, Fred, Grace, Henri, Ida, Joaquin, Kate, Larry, Mindy, Nicholas, Odette, Peter, Rose, Sam, Teresa, Victor, Wanda
Future Update: Humorous Headlines of Tomorrow
Future Update is designed to give you a humorous glimpse of what the news might look like 20 years from now.
Death Vaccine Submitted to FDA for Approval
by Skip DeKades
October 6, 2028 — Eli Lilly & Co. is seeking Food and Drug Administration approval of a new death vaccine that could offer hope to millions of people who fear dying sometime in their lifetime.
The vaccine, called Survivasil, has been found in clinical trials to halt the cellular damage associated with aging and to prevent any form of disease.
To test the vaccine against cancer, AIDS, heart disease, Alzheimer’s disease and a host of other deadly and/or degenerative illnesses, Eli Lilly administered the treatment to more than 15,000 people and followed their genes over a 10-year period. None of the vaccinated patients developed any genetic mutations that signaled the likelihood or onset of any serious illness. Nor did their cells break down.
Eli Lilly is continuing to monitor the vaccine’s safety by studying 45,000 people in a managed care organization, the FDA says.
The most common side effects from Survivasil include headache, nausea, confusion, identity crisis, gluttony, and prolonged adolescence.
Medical ethicist Donna Pleygod, MD, warned that the vaccine could give people a false sense of security and lead them into reckless behaviors such as aggressive driving and extreme sports.
“This vaccine doesn’t prevent death by accident,” Pleygod said. “It’s not a cure for stupidity.”
Vaccinate yourself against the blues at Humor-Blogs.com.
Coming Out Friday, August 21
Shorts- Jon Cryer / William H. Macy
Casi Divas- Patricia Llaca / Julio Bracho
Post Grad-Alexis Bledel / Zach Gilford
Inglourious Basterds- Brad Pitt / Eli Roth
Interesting Web Sites to Surf this weekend
Recipe for the Week:
Insanely Amazing Jalapeno Cheese Dip
Take this delicious, 5-minute prep, jalapeno cheese dip to BBQs, cookouts, parties, or any other occasion. This dish will make you the most popular person there! Serve with bread, crackers, or chips."
PREP TIME- 10 Min
COOK TIME-30 Min
READY IN-40 Min
1 (4 ounce) can diced jalapeno peppers
1 cup shredded Parmesan cheese
1/2 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
1 cup mayonnaise
1 (4 ounce) can chopped green chilies
1 round loaf sourdough bread
Preheat an oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Combine jalapeno peppers, Parmesan cheese, Cheddar cheese, mayonnaise, and green chilies in a bowl. Cut the top off of the sourdough bread and hollow out the center to create a bowl. Fill the bread bowl with the jalapeno mixture.
Bake in the preheated oven for 30 minutes.